Rain rain go away

Unstoppable rain
Keeps shooting out my butt hole
I am likely ill

The lack of the outside

It is easy to isolate yourself in today's pandemic world. Today I took it a step further, I stopped consuming all news and information feeds. I didn't go on any social media, didn't go on reddit, didn't watch tv, didn't listen to podcasts, I didn't even listen to the radio or music in the car. I really absolutely do not know what went on today outside of the little I actually experienced first hand.

With the absences of outside information, I put my attention elsewhere, like in ____ and in ____ oh yeah also in _____, ____ was totally rad, _____ was definitely the best tho, _____ was a close second. Believe me I will _____ next.

Yeah fun day. No regrets at all, none. I will do this for now on. I totally don't need the outside, why should I care about anything there? It doesn't affect me directly. "Ignorance is bliss" is such a cliche, god I hate that.

Long Haul Update

90% There.

That's where I'm at. One more month and I'll be back to normal.

I said that a month ago, and I believe I am still at that stage. I don't get extreme fatigue anymore or brain fog. I still have a pounding heartbeat sometimes, and tightness in the chest. I still get bouts of inflammation,  this triggers occasional wheezing in some cases strong enough to warrant a puff of my rescue inhaler.

I need to follow a better diet, a low inflammation diet. I have already cut alcohol, coffee, caffeine, soda. I very much need to cut deep fried foods out.

Sometimes I wake up feeling normal, it feels good. Like I can function normally again, but once a few hours rolls along my heart rate raises and I feel something a miss. I don't know if it is anxiety or if this is triggering anxiety, either way it is anxiety.

I have to avoid any type of stress, emotional, physical, everything. My nervous system is fucked up. When I was at my worst, I would get super jittery, I would physically tremble.

I tried some vagus nerve stimulation which involves humming. It is interesting. I don't know if it is helping, but it is a bit meditative.

My recovery has been slow, a glacial pace, but it is moving in a better area.

On positive news, my relationship with my dad has been better.

Steam

The first awkward date
Started with a bowl of pho
Ended with a kiss